A little story

Today was our first big test of the year, in Music class. Let me tell you: my first day of music class, all we did was sing little songs from a songbook about peace and Jesus. I thought, this is so awesome! This is like being ten years old again and playing the steel drums or autoharp or whatever. Well, music class is actually very, very difficult. I would say it is my second-hardest class, after chemistry. OK, and physics. In physics I literally understand nothing, nothing at all. It's probably even harder than math, or would be if I weren't such a dunce in math.

Anyway, we had a big test on jazz history, and jazz chords. I'd hoped that I'd at least be able to write a couple questions on the test, but that was optimistic -- I understood nothing. The music teacher came up to me, and I sad pathetically, "Ich kann das nicht." We looked at the paper, and then we looked at each other and laughed and laughed. "Continue to laugh!" he said in German. "You can just sit here laughing instead of writing the test! Tell me everything you know about jazz. You're American, you must know something." Miraculously, I understood everything he'd just said, but the satisfaction that comes with that is fleeting. Actually, it disappears in under a second -- as soon as I realize that there's no way I can convey that I understood everything, because I can't speak German! This is especially difficult when I'm talking to someone who speaks NO English (my music teacher.)

"Ich kann das nicht," I said sadly. "Ich kenne Jazz nicht." The music teacher just laughed at me. "Du bist americanisch!" he said again. Then he turned around to face the class and announced (in German, obviously,) "She's American, and she doesn't know anything about jazz! No wonder they say nobody learns anything in America." (Or something to that effect, I don't know exactly.) Everyone in the class started laughing at me.

"Country?" he suggested. "Kennst du Country? Just tell me what you know."

Well, that's pretty broad, I thought. That's okay. I started out by writing (in German), "Because I know nothing of jazz, and just a bit of country, I'm telling you all I know of the Beatles, and what I didn't forget."

I went on to schreib as much as I could, using such ingenious lines as, "Now the Beatles were in Beatlemania. They were beloved. One didn't hear in their concerts, because the crowd was too loud" and "In the next years, the Beatles had many changes. George Harrison was married. John Lennon divorced with his wife Cynthia. In 1966 John Lennon and Bob Dylan met together. Bob Dylan gave him marijuana. With the new drug was coming a new music style."

Then I finished (rather abruptly, after a brief description of Ravi Shankar -- "He was called the Sitar master and from him learned George Harrison Indian music") by writing, "Today the Beatles are still an influence. Like Daniel Johnston. Daniel Johnston is a beloved influence in 'outsider art.' He had mental illness. When he was young he loved the Beatles, and could with them identify." I included the lyrics of "The Beatles" to illustrate my point. (Ha ha.)

So we'll see how I do on the "test." I'm hoping for a five, personally (second-worst), or even an "ungradable." We'll see.