Tomorrow is the first day back at school after a long April break. I have a lot coming up before school ends in a VERY FINITE AMOUNT OF TIME. I've procrastinated on my USM class again, and AP exams are imminent. Leonard Cohen helps. I like this first line because it makes me think about feeling lonely in places where there are lots of people around, like today. I appreciate his poetry a lot.
The "school drama" that has emerged recently seems to be mostly caused by the prospect of being totally done at the shack in a few short weeks. I feel bad about how detached from this I feel. I am really happy and excited to be done with school. I want Charlotte to come home and I want summer to happen. I am dreading having to say goodbye to people I care about (Max, Charlotte, Lilly, etc) but I feel very finished with school and ready to move on. I probably will not cry at graduation, which makes me wonder if I have no heart.
Also, GERMANY. Germany is like a piece missing from my soul. Forgive my melodrama, but there is a piece of me that I left there. I want to go recover it. And somehow also fit in the fabulous WWOOFing plan that I have constructed from January-June. I have a strong impulse to travel, stronger than I can ever remember having, and I wish there wasn't anything (i.e. money) holding me back.
Die deutsche Sprache fehlt mir. Ich habe jeden Tag Angst, dass ich sie total vergesse. Ich versuche Bücher zu lesen, Deutsche Welle zu hören, und so weiter, aber es ist einfach so, dass mein Deutsch nur schlecht wird, weil ich einfach in den USA bist, und kann nicht mehr regelmässig sprechen. So ist es.
